But, I wanted to update everyone and end 2015 with a personal post about my year, along with the ups and downs, so figured I would allow one post from my phone as it's more writing than pictures.
Well well well 2015, you were not what I expected... I've learnt an incredible lot in just a year and have realised just how quickly things can change, for good or for bad. I've also learnt a bloody lot about myself as well, which is surprising because I thought I had 'me' figured out already, but I'm 23 (which is actually still young despite me feeling that I'm old and missed all my chances to do things I Want to) and apparently 2015 still had a lot for me to learn, good and hmmm maybe not so good.
I started 2015...with... A boyfriend, if you'd have told me I'd be in a relationship with a 'smelly boy' 6 months before ,I would have laughed and been on my 2nd bottle of rosé dancing on my dining room chairs, music full blast with my housemates ready to go out, boys were not on my list of prioritys, but a year down the line and I am in a very happy relationship with 'bae' Josh, we've been through so much in our first year together...it's actually quite nuts but he really is my best friend and always encourages me in everything I do, which, I am very thankful for even though I may not show it all the time. *add to new year res list*
The biggest and hardest thing I learnt in 2015 (with the help of Josh) is that I don't have to be strong all the time, or put on a brave face when in reality I'm really struggling inside, I realised I had been struggling with anxiety for a lot longer than I had thought and never knew I actually had a problem that really did need addressing (very in-denial) I didn't properly understand mental health and that there is a lot of help out there if I was willing to go after it and accept I needed a little bit of help, I'd battled on my own for so long that eventually I had to give in and do the right thing for myself and for others around me. I really lost sight of 'Louisa' and turned into someone I didn't even know myself, which was very scary, all of a sudden I had new fears I never knew existed before, and I became very unconfident and no longer in touch with myself. It was a long hard few months but with so much support, some medication and some counselling session I can finally say I'm out the other side and in such a good place!!! And I've also realised just how bad I really was. It's taught me that opening up about my feelings and struggles really does help and also helps close ones to understand what's going on, it's also ok to have 'bad days' and it's not a sign of weakness that I would of felt before. I learnt a lot.
I've also had a lot of ups like my amazing birthday trip to Paris, which was just fabulous and would deffos recommend.
I moved back to my Dad's and am so glad because I really am a family girl at heart and I always will be, so seeing more of my Dad and sister is such a good feeling.
I entered the world of blogging!!! And I love it! I realised that I actually really enjoy the writing side of the blog as well as posing for the camera (but I already knew that haha) I also love making my Instagram look really pretty and am constantly taking pictures to upload!!!
I feel like so much has gone on in 2015 that I'd be far too long going on about it so I'm going to bring this post to an end, i'm already very excited for the year ahead and know 'amazing things are going to happen' I just feel that positive 'things' (in all sorts of ways) are seriously due and I'm going to make sure of that!!!
I hope everyone has a brilliant end to the year and 2016 is a brilliant year all round!!!
Lots of love Louisa xxx
